Here, in the Present

I’ve realized that though I am very open to change, I am quick to evaluate (coughcough judge) said change. If the new system doesn’t seem to be working after my three-week-judge-free-trial, then I’m ready for either a change in a new direction, or back the way we came from. Anything to keep things running smoothly.

It’s because I’m a problem-solver.

Whenever something isn’t working at its full potential, I want to fix it. Kind of like Fix-It-Felix but less jumpy. Well … maybe I’m a bit fidgety to jump in quickly and improve the situation. But observing and assessing are two things I do 24/7, whether consciously or not. I can tell that this type of fundraising isn’t working as efficiently as a different kind could. I can tell that my messy room is hampering me from my full potential. I can tell that new leadership is trying to move an unguided organization, and it’s not going to work well. At least in the next year.

See, I may see what’s happening now, but I’m terrible at looking at the future. I’m not talking about seers or hand reading, but about the long term effects. This is probably not the best since I want to become an economist. I am terrible at making goals though. Where do I want to be in five years? I don’t know. Happy? Sitting with friends and family? What do I want to be doing in ten years? Not dead hopefully! I mean seriously, I am basically unable to make long term goals or plans. After college, (which is only going to be a small part of my life) I have no plans. I can see myself having a great job in a beautiful city, and I can see myself bumming around America with nothing but a car and a tent.

It’s a problem, I know.

But here’s the deal. We have so many future-focused people (which isn’t a bad thing!) that maybe we need some here-and-now people to look at what we’ve got. Something isn’t working? Throw it out. Group doesn’t fit you right? Leave. Sure, the grand plan may have worked in five years, but a lot can happen in five years. Maybe I think this way because I’m a teenager. As the news says, we teenagers want everything “quick and easy”. But maybe it’s because I’m tired of seeing society drag on. I want quick, creative innovation. I want a more efficient work force filled with people trying to improve the present in a way that is preparing for future generations. Don’t tell me about your twenty-year-plan. What are you doing now about the homeless? the hungry? the depressed? We’re not living in the future, we’re living now. I may need some help later on forming five-year-plans, but for now, I’m focusing on observing and assessing the change and lack thereof around me, here in the present.


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