My Struggles With Love

My testimony used to be all about the struggles I went through when I moved. It focused on the darkness that invaded my life and the dark places I went because of that. But now, I don’t feel like that’s the focus of my life. Yeah, that time period greatly impacted who I am today, but it no longer defines me. So yesterday when I was asked to write out my testimony, I started a new chapter. So here it is, the first draft of my new testimony.

I thought there was a formula for love. Do this and that, and I’ll feel loved. But what does love even feel like? I started studying love. Looking at Bible verses, reading works by professionals, googling “what is love?”. I got so frustrated ad discouraged because I couldn’t figure out what love was. Consequently, I never felt like I was loved. I figured out what love was when I painted my room. It had been a long day of moving furniture and painting, and my parents and I were in the final stage of moving my furniture back into my room. It was late at night and I was so tired and so done that I just sat in the corner, too exhausted to go on. My parents were just as tired as I was, it was plain to see on their faces, but they kept working. That’s when I realized that love is sacrifice and something with a formula, but more so something that I just had to go with the flow. No rules, no regullations. My parents were sacrificing their energy to help get my room back in order because they love me.
Love has now become my purpose in life. To love and be loved. I came to this purpose because loving is what gives me joy in life. If all I could do is love and be loved for the rest of my days, I would be content. Happy. Joyful. Fulfilled. Passing on God’s eternal and unconditional love to others is what matters most to me.

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One thought on “My Struggles With Love

  1. blmaluso says:

    “That’s when I realized that love is sacrifice” A profound truth that some people never learn. May the Holy Spirit continue to open your eyes and heart to His love…so that you may continue to share that love with others. Love,
    Bernadette

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